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So, if you have clicked on this tab you are probably considering couple counseling or marital therapy. Naturally, you or your partner may experience some anxiety about coming in to talk with a therapist, which is totally understandable for several reasons. Some believe that talking about problems will make things worse. Initially, that may be true as emotions can get stirred up and acted upon in ways that most likely resemble or intensify what had you exploring therapy to begin with. However, as long as both parties are committed to the therapeutic process and willing to do the hard work required for producing the desired change, it will quickly become clear that the other alternative, doing nothing, is a much more problematic option. Often times, one or both parties are fearful of being blamed or that they will be labeled as the problem and singled out and ganged up on as the person that needs to change. In reading more below you will find that to be unacceptable in the therapeutic process of relational therapy. Others are from a position that we can work it out ourselves and we don't need a stranger to tell us how or what to do to make things better. You are right! You can work it out yourselves and you don't need to be told what to do. Yet, sometimes it takes a third party to open up possibilities and guide through the difficult process of change. All of the aforementioned concerns and several other possible factors that may detour you from taking the next step are valid and can be appreciated but keep in mind, it takes great courage to do something different, particularly initiating a new, therapeutic relationship.
What to Expect
Couple therapy works best when both parties are involved and in attendance at every session. There may be occasion to hold an individual session or two but it will be balanced, meaning if one partner meets for 2 individual sessions the other partner will also meet for 2 individual sessions. The individual sessions are not intended for divulging secrets or to talk negatively about the other person. The intent is to allow a collaborative exploration of the experience of the individual within the context of the relationship to gain more clarity and understanding of what's going on individually so that it may be processed in conjoint sessions. You will experience a safe and supportive environment during your therapeutic work, free from judgement or blame, even in cases of adultery as acceptance offers more beneficial outcomes when working to repair a relationship. Mr. Jordan uses a therapeutic approach called Emotion Focused Therapy (EFT) and he has completed the first stage of intensive training to become certified in EFT. This is very much a process oriented approach to therapy where we will together explore the unique ways each person experiences self, other and the relationship. Obviously, emotions are at the core of the change process given the name of the type of therapy and you can expect to participate in 10-20 sessions. If you would like to learn more about EFT, please review the Recommended Books tab on the website and take a look at Hold Me Tight, by Dr. Susan Johnson.
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